the beginning

Where shall I start? Any story teller will ask and you’ll hear the words: At the beginning… But where is the beginning? There are so many fragmented beginnings, so many false starts, so many chances at getting off the blocks faster each time. But that’s making the assumption that this is a race, where as in reality this is a slow burn, a place to come and grow slowly… So I will pick one possible beginning, out of a miriad of possibles…

And it all begins with a long long sleep….

 

sleeping_beauty_by_abigaillarson-d6pj6ni

 

Once upon a time there was a women named Kate. She did not know if she was young or old. She was lost in time. A time that swallowed up her spirit and spat her out into mundanity. She knew she was a mother and a wife but that was all. her essence of herself had been swallowed up by the bears who had haunted her since childhood.

She knew that she had lived 42 winters because she had watched the snow come and go from her kitchen window. She had sat on the grassy bank under the oak tree and watched the starlings murmurate every autumn. And every spring had picked the daffodils that lined the lonely driveway. And as for summers she’s spent summer days, let out of the house to go to the beach, but not before having to organise all the beach picnic, beach toys for the kids and everything that was needed. She didn’t protest she did it willingly. She knew no other way but this.

There was a magic window that she looked out of daily and that was a window onto a wider world. It was a thrilling world of people who did stuff, thought brilliant thoughts and made friends with each other.

One day the magic window suggested a group of people that she might like to join. They were people who loved freely with no possession. They seemed to love with no expectations and she liked the look of them.

She began to realise that she was lonely. Not because she didn’t have lots of beautiful people in her life. She did. But as she slowly began to realise that she was not happy in her choices, she felt further and further distanced from the ones who were happy in the same kind of life she was still in. It began to feel like a coat that didn’t quite fit properly. A hat that was too tight and gave her a headache.

She looked at these people living their lives freely, and she was entranced. She felt like she was waking up from a deep slumber, and still groggy, she clicked the ‘join’ button which would gain her entry to this new world.

 

 

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